Need or Want

Why do we give so much importance to the love at first sight?

1. Evolutionary perspective – our reproductive system bonds fastest, forming quick attachment. Its like an species continuation….
2. Romantic Idealism – during our upbringing we have heard great love stories on love at first sight and the passion behind them.
3. Hormone Impact – dopamine driving the intense pleasure and reward sensations
4. Emotional Intensity – it is exhilarating
5. Personal Validation – it gives us validation to our choices and belief system.

So, I would say when you are in love at first sight its not about the person whom you like… its about the needs of your own self the inner healing and gaps that you desire for. So its not love towards someone, but the love you are not giving your self, your own validation.

It will change with time, as you will either get what you desire or the longing which is not getting fulfilled will remain and make you more vulnerable and toxic at times.

When you get in love the next time, it will be more about you are capable to fulfill your own needs, but still you chose to be with the other person, you want to be with the other person..

So, when you do not actively need the person for your joys, success, pains, moments etc.. but you want to share life along that’s the most beautiful relationship where you grow…